Because I enjoy embarrassing myself on the internet I’ve got another story from my weird childhood.

I’ve always been kind of fascinated with Renaissance festivals. That alone should be weird enough, but, again, I like to outdo myself with how weird I can be. I had one of my birthday parties there once. It wasn’t so much a party as it was a few friends, my poor family, and I went to the RenFair for my birthday. If it wasn’t so expensive I would have insisted upon renting a costume as well, but, alas, it was a few hundred dollars. So what’s a girl to do? Well if you’re this girl you buy something that becomes your go-to accessory for the next few months? Years? What accessory could possibly be so amazing to become my number 1 accessory? A snood. What the hell is a snood, you ask? It’s a hairnet, but don’t you dare call it a hairnet to little Brittany! She’ll insist that it should be called by it’s proper name, or she’ll get all pouty and throw a tantrum.

I didn’t even get a cute one. I walked around for the longest time looking like I moonlighted in the school cafeteria. It might explain why the food was always awful. You might ask yourself “why would your parents let you run around looking like a miniature lunch lady?” That’s a good question, friend, and I assume the answer is something along the lines of “you have to pick your battles.” Most kids go through a weird fashion phase. Some of us just have weirder and longer phases than others…to our mother’s extreme displeasure and embarrassment. I almost feel bad that she had to suffer through being seen with me in public, but then I remember all the embarrassing things she did in public and don’t feel so bad. So in case you’re ever having a not so great fashion day just remember that at least you don’t accessorize with a hairnet.

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